Why I chose to look more closely at being "too busy"
“ It takes deep love to heal that belief and cultivate the knowing for ourselves that we *are* worthy of more. It's taken me deep psychological + magical work that no amount of floral baths would have fixed in isolation.”
~ Nicole Barton
For many modern women the idea of self-care is a fantasy. Back in the day where I was living a mundane life, I'd have said I didn't have time for it. I'd have said I was "too busy" as I ran around doing what the world expected, working my bum into the ground in a professional career that exhausted me, bending to other people's desires, saying "I don't mind".
So the fact that today, I 'indulge' in rose petal + herbal paths whilst supping hot cacao and open my heart to my desires being provided + allowed is a far cry from who I used to be (I write in inverted commas as I no longer see these things as 'indulgent' but necessary).
There can be a misconception about my work - you see, I'm not simply guiding women into more self-care and bubble baths (though of course that's always part of the invitation).
I'm not just inviting you to interrupt the flow of your mundane lives to just wear more face cream, buy some perfume and treat yourselves to jewellery and "me time".
All of these things are *needed* and important (more important than we might allow ourselves to believe, actually - which is largely why women don't choose it).
But their lack is merely a SYMPTOM of something deeper that wants love.
The *real* work on offer here is to take a true, honest look at the deeper underlying *patterns* that are keeping you unconsciously (innocently) choosing the dull, mundane life you say you don't want.
What I help women with is healing and liberating the unconscious patterns that stop them from choosing differently.
🖤 The shame - particularly around their deep sensitivity and true needs and desires, which have largely been ignored
🖤 The people pleasing - especially how they run around filling everyone's cup but their own
🖤 The longing for approval - which is the deeper underlying piece that has them running around in burn out, still giving
🖤 The numbing of themselves with TV, good, alcohol, work, medication - because they fear that if they life the lid off the bin all the garbage will explode everywhere.
Ultimately, I'm guiding women into the deeper *love of self* (not your typical 'self-love, acceptance' stuff but a true welcoming and radical approval of all) that has them reconnect to their power to choose to be fully who they really are - beyond the noise of the shame, fear and doubt that their inner little girl holds on to.
I help women see that 'too busy' is a mere symptom of (innocently) not being in touch with their true power to *choose* life.
And of a deeper, more ingrained cultural fear:
My rose petal baths are really a manifestation of my deeper *healing* I've created for my old, shame-instilled belief that I had that I was "not worthy".
It takes deep love to heal that belief and cultivate the knowing for ourselves that we *are* worthy of more. It's taken me deep psychological + magical work that no amount of floral baths would have fixed in isolation.
And it's rippled out not just into self-care, but into the way I magically choose all of life now - how I choose to live fully from deep alignment (which once looked impossible, to the point I used to feel suicidal).
And so, if you see me flouncing around, sharing my rose petals, chocolate, pink fizz, spa days, massages and gorgeous clothes, my rituals and my wild wanders - and you perhaps think "I wish I could do that" - or even "who is she to do that?" - or even "we don't need that" - all is welcome.
Just know that it's because I healed my inner little girl's shaming of my neurodivergent sensitivity, my needs, my numbing, my people-pleasing and looking for my worth in other people's approval.
It's because I now *know* that I *am* worthy.
And not simply of the self-care (though that's a start) -
But worthy of loving myself enough to choose a more magical LIFE. Full stop.
Do you know that you're worthy of the exact same?
It is my deepest longing that you choose to discover that.
All my love,
if you've any questions, send me an email.
Nicole x
